How Boko Haram can be defeated

By Max Siollun
The Nigerian military has struggled to
have any effect in the face of Boko
Haram’s intensifying attacks. But with the
right combination of military and non-
military, short- and long-term strategies,
the Islamist militants can be stopped, as
Max Siollun explains.
The casualties and suffering that have been
caused by the Islamist militant group Boko
Haram over the past five years are mind-
boggling. According to estimates, 12,000 people
have been killed, 8,000 thousand more have
been injured or maimed, and thousands of
innocent people have been displaced by the
conflict. Even more worryingly, around half of
those deaths have come in just the past year.
Nigeria is being haunted by the ghost of past
mistakes, and a gigantic coop of chickens has
come home to roost, though it is not as if the
country was not pre-warned. In the early 1980s,
northern Nigeria was rocked by a violent
uprising by an Islamic sect led by a
Cameroonian preacher known as “Maitatsine”.
4,000 people were killed and the commission
that investigated the violence reported:
“Because of the very wide gap between the rich
and the poor in our society…[Maitatsine’s sect]
were more than prepared to rise against the
society at the slightest opportunity.” The
commission advised: “This regrettable social
situation in our society ought to be remedied
immediately else it will continue to provide the
required recruitment potential for disenchanted
men…to rebel.”
The government did not heed these lessons. It
did little to address economic inequality or
religious extremism, leaving in place the
conditions under which Boko Haram could
emerge. The insurgency has flourished over the
past five years and the attempts to combat it
have largely fallen flat. With the right
combination of long-term planning and
execution, however, the Islamist militant group
can be defeated.
Tackling Boko Haram?
The methods deployed so far against Boko
Haram have had the same effect as pouring
petrol on an open fire. The Nigerian army has
been accused of mishandling the insurgency,
and any or all of: the indiscriminate use of
force, torturing innocent civilians, and being
reluctant to confront Boko Haram fighters.
The army might argue that there are mitigating
factors which hamper it. It is trained for
conventional warfare and peacekeeping
operations. Elaborate hostage rescues and
fighting AK-47 wielding Islamist biker gangs in
the middle of city centres are not its forte. Since
Nigeria has never experienced an insurgency of
this type or magnitude before, the army is in
the odd situation of being tested on the
battlefield first, and learning the lessons
afterwards. It has had to adapt to a new type of
war and learn on the job.
The terrain does not favour the army either.
The combined size of the three states in north-
eastern Nigeria worst affected by Boko Haram –
Borno, Yobe, and Adamawa States – is roughly
equal to that of Tunisia, or five times that of
Switzerland. Trying to hunt down militants
dressed in civilian attire, blended in with
millions of civilians in villages, towns, cities,
markets, and forests in an area that size with
only a few helicopters and aeroplanes is no
easy feat.
The army also faces operational challenges.
Some soldiers have complained of being under-
equipped and finding themselves outgunned by
heavily armed Boko Haram militants. More
accurately, the issue may be that the army is
incorrectly equipped for this type of conflict.
Earlier this year, Nigeria’s former Chief of
Defence Staff, General Martin Luther Agwai
astutely observed that: “Our military is properly
equipped to fight yesterday’s war”.
The federal government has been looking for a
silver bullet solution to crush the insurgency
with a single blow. However, they have
belatedly learned the same painful lesson that
the British learned with the IRA in Northern
Ireland and that America has been learning
with al-Qaeda and the Taliban in Afghanistan
and beyond. As the former Minister of the
Federal Capital Territory, Nasir El-Rufai, once
commented rhetorically: “Tell me where in the
world military action alone has solved an
insurgency.” And as Agwai conceded, “You can
never solve any of these problems with military
solutions…It is a political issue; it is a social
issue; it is an economic issue; and until these
issues are addressed, the military can never
give you a solution.”
But if military force cannot stop the insurgency,
what else can be done? The often-repeated
mantra is that economic development is the
antidote to violent extremism. However, who
will invest in a region wracked by violence and
insecurity and in which militants destroy any
signs of development, such as schools and
mobile telephone masts?
Government indecision
The government’s strategy so far has appeared
to be schizophrenic at times, vacillating between
vowing to “crush” Boko Haram, pleading with
them to negotiate, and offering them an
amnesty. The government’s approach has been
of saying the right things but at the wrong time,
or of doing the right things but in the wrong
way.
Military force and negotiations are part of the
solution, not all of it. And an amnesty should be
the end of the conflict resolution process, not
the start of it. In April 2013, the government
made itself look weak and desperate by offering
an amnesty to Boko Haram without getting
anything in return, while it also demonstrated
the government’s myopia about the group,
which does not recognise the secular Nigerian
government. The offer was contemptuously
rebuffed. Boko Haram does not even respect the
authority of venerated Islamic figures in
northern Nigeria, such as the emirs. Boko
Haram has either killed, or tried to kill, emirs
and imams who criticised their violence. This is
the equivalent of Christian rebels killing priests.
It is not all a tale of mishaps though. The
government is learning, albeit belatedly, and
has made some tentative steps in the right
direction. The National Security Adviser Colonel
Sambo Dasuki (retired) appointed Fatima Akilu,
a psychologist, to work as the Director of
Behavioural Analysis and Strategic
Communication in his office. Akilu has designed
a programme called “Countering Violent
Extremism” which maps out a blueprint for de-
radicalising and rehabilitating militants,
preventing others from being radicalised, and a
communication strategy to counter Boko
Haram’s narrative. The syllabus for military
cadets at the Nigerian Defence Academy has
also been modified to give cadets training in
counter-terrorism.
Meanwhile, a volunteer civilian security group
known as the Civilian Joint Task Force (CJTF)
may have provided a template for community-
based security that can be applied elsewhere, if
refined. The CJTF is a cross between a
neighbourhood watch scheme and ruthless
vigilantes. Due to Nigeria’s massive ethno-
linguistic diversity, and the federal nature of its
security forces, police officers and soldiers are
often deployed in areas they have never been to
before and where they are complete strangers,
with no understanding of the local culture or
language. This makes it very difficult for them
to gain the cooperation or trust of locals. This is
where the CJTF can be of assistance. Although it
is armed only with rudimentary weapons such
as sticks, knives, and old rifles, the CJTF’s local
knowledge, and in some cases individual
knowledge of Boko Haram members, has
helped them “out” Boko Haram members to the
army.
The CJTF’s cooperation with regular security
forces has also helped deter attacks in
Maiduguri, the capital of Borno State and
biggest city in north-eastern Nigeria, and push
the militants out into more rural areas. In fact,
ironically, the CJTF’s success in Maiduguri may
have indirectly led to Boko Haram’s kidnap of
hundreds of schoolgirls in the town of Chibok
and elsewhere; with the CJTF present in
Maiduguri, Boko Haram moved out of the city
into more vulnerable areas with plenty of “soft
targets” such as schools.
Other political forums have also been
advocating good governance, economic
development, and education as solutions. These
are all noble suggestions, though it must be
noted that they will take years or even
generations to have effect. There is no bottle of
anti-terror pills that the government can get
from a chemist and force-feed to Boko Haram’s
fighters. Rather, it must drip-feed a cocktail of
anti-terror solutions into Boko Haram’s
ecosystem.
Iron fist in a velvet glove
The military alone cannot end the insurgency,
but it does have a crucial role to play. Military
force is the means that can be used to buy
enough “quiet time” for the government to
come up with permanent solutions. The military
must use enough force to either reduce the
frequency and intensity of Boko Haram’s
attacks, or pressurise it into considering a
ceasefire.
To do this, the intelligence agencies will have to
start by massively upgrading their poor
intelligence on Boko Haram. The evidence
suggests that Boko Haram has been more
successful at infiltrating the military than the
other way around.
Although Boko Haram acts like a ceasefire is a
non-starter, it is possible if the government
learns to speak the group’s language. The
concept of a Hudna (an Arabic phrase that can
mean “calm” or “cessation”) is a part of Islamic
jurisprudence recognised by other Islamic
insurgents, such as Palestine’s Hamas.
A Hudna can be a long-term cessation of
hostilities, lasting several years, which can also
be renewed. Given that the federal government
will never accept Boko Haram’s goal of an
Islamic theocracy within Nigeria’s borders and
that Boko refuses to subordinate itself to
Nigeria’s secular institutions, a long-term
Hudna may be a way of allowing both sides to
get what they want without losing face.
The government could propose a Hudna as a
temporary ceasefire or peace treaty, while Boko
Haram can claim it did not abandon its jihad
but sheathed its swords in a manner consistent
with its cosmology.
Right now though, Boko Haram has little reason
to consider a ceasefire. It has a large mobile
army, a massive stockpile of weapons and
ammunition, and controls several thousand
square kilometres of territory in north-eastern
Nigeria. The government must therefore create
its own bargaining chips to elevate its position
at the table. Leverage could come from taking
Boko Haram members alive as prisoners rather
than summarily executing them.
Prisoners would have strategic value as assets
that could be used to negotiate the release of the
hundreds of kidnapped children. Drying up the
reservoir of potential Boko Haram recruits
would also amplify the importance of Boko
Haram prisoners, by making their members
harder to replace.
The former British Chief of Defence Staff,
General Sir David Richards, believes that
“economic liberation” of the population is
critical in defeating doctrinal insurgencies. The
type of economic development that will
disincentivise young men from joining Boko
Haram though is not the typical Nigerian type
of grandiose white elephant projects that the
average man and woman care little about.
Instead, drip-fed investments on tangible
projects such as roads, water, jobs, and
electricity are more likely to undermine the
insurgents’ violent alternatives.
This war, however, must be fought not only on
the battlefield, but also by using the media and
educational establishments. The media, Koranic
schools and religious authorities have a key role
to play by challenging Boko Haram’s
interpretation of Islam, and by providing
alternate non-violent narratives. Nigeria must
also develop a counter-insurgency doctrine and
apply it uniformly across the military,
intelligence agencies, and teaching
establishments.
Ending this insurgency will also require a
regional solution. Nigeria cannot do this alone.
Nigeria is located in a “bad neighbourhood” in
which many of its counterparts, such as Chad,
Cameroon, Niger, and Mali are experiencing
insecurity too. Nigeria cannot expect to avoid
catching a cold if its neighbours sneeze, and
vice versa.
The morning after
With the right strategies, Nigeria can undermine
Boko Haram, militarily, economically and
psychologically. But the government must also
start preparing for “the morning after” today.
At some point, this insurgency will end and the
government will face difficult questions.
How will it re-house and compensate the
displaced people? What will it do about the
thousands of students whose education has
been disrupted by school closures and/or being
kidnapped? How will the victims who have
been raped, injured, or rendered orphans or
widows by Boko Haram react when they see
economic opportunities being given to people
who killed their family members?
One day, the same security forces that fought
Boko Haram may have to protect ex-militants
from score-settling attacks by their victims.
The short-term forecast for Nigeria is of more
bloodshed and violence between security forces
and Boko Haram. The long-term forecast is that
the insurgency can be terminated, but only by
thorough long-term planning, a robust military
strategy resolute enough to pressurise the
group, but flexible enough to rehabilitate
repentant militants, and creating space for
economic development. The solution to
Nigeria’s problem may well be bitter tasting
and slow-acting. But this anti-terror medicine is
one it will have to brace itself for and take.

The Actual Declaration of Bishop David Oyedepo

Bishop Oyedepo said: "All those opposing and are against
the peace of Nigeria, God would
open the gates of hell to them". Those were
his words.
But propagandists twisted his words.

Note:
I was in the service today. It was our
thanksgiving service today after the 21days
fasting period.

The Crime of Image-Laundering

Dear Ronke,

Inset:Buhari Refuses To Take off His Cap

I have been following several of your posts and arguments
to defend Buhari, but I would assume your Buharimania
stand should be reconsider within the following points:
By shutting down Ijora power station in Lagos and his
refusal to activate the Ashejire generating unit at Ibadan,
Buhari effectively destroyed industrial base of south-
western Nigeria and this eventually led to the surviving
industry relocating to Ghana and West Africa. Never mind
the epileptic Egbin,Ikorodu power station that is decorative.
As at now Buhari sees nothing wrong with the electricity
consumer in Southwestern Nigeria paying 55% of NEPA/
PHCN bill and the Arewa north paying virtually nothing for
the past 50 years. So much for piety and uprightness of
Buhari and his fellow Arewa travellers and their see no
evil,hear no evil stooges like OBJ, Tinubu, Rochas, Amaechi
etc from other tribes.
Alhaji Lawal Kaita is old enough to be an uncle to Alhaji
General Muhammadu Buhari, and both of them are from any
of the Arab emirates (republics) of West Africa but Buhari
did not condemned him when he uttered the treasonable
statement "We shall make Nigeria ungovernable
for...Buhari knows that Lawal Kaita is only articulating the
common beliefs of the elites of Arewa north anytime a
kaferi like Jonathan, Ironsi etc that are not Arewa's
candidate tried to soil the sacred GREEN WHITE COLOUR OF
(SAUDI ARABIA, NIGERIA and BOKO HARAM. Yes BH's flag
is the same Green & White) Shagari, Buhari, IBB, the
Abachas, Maitama Sule, Abdusalam, TY Danjuma,
Mohammed Marwa, El-Rufai, Sanusi Lamido Sanusi etc
never condemned this felonious statement. People are not
surprise because these same group of people who believe
fanatically in the upholding of Arab culture/interest pointedly
denied the manifestations of the following people for the
progress or otherwise in Nigeria and West Africa:
• MKO Abiola (The June 12, 1993 electoral tragedy)
• Ken Saro Wiwa and eight other Ogonis (execution)
• Obafemi Awolowo and other like-minded progressives
were denied their attempt to CHANGE Nigeria from ultra-
conservatism of the Arewa north to purely African socio-
political structure like that of Kwame Nkrumah's Ghana
• Alafin of Oyo in the 19th century was also denied the
leadership of the Yorubaland by the Dan Fodian, Fulani Arab
Jihadist ancestors of Buhari and co.
• Buhari never condemned the expulsion of Ghanians and
other non-Arabised tribes in West Africa (Ghana-Must-Go)
by his fellow Fulani Arab brother Usman Shehu Shagari
• Buhari promulgated War Against Indiscipline supposedly to
tidy up Nigeria but in reality was an instrument to cause
dislocation in
non-Arabised societies of Nigeria such as the banning of the
age old Onikiri culture (traditional hawkers) who are the
main source of security reporting to the elders of every
communities. But the same W.A.I. did not prohibit nomadic
Fulani cattle herdsmen from carrying on their age old
tradition of wandering illegally over other tribal lands.
Sacred groves and forests were violated and depleted by
uncontrolled grazing till now. Why weren't there restricted to
ranches as it is done all over the world? If the Onikiri
hawkers could be restricted on their own ancestral land,
then what right has the landless, rootless, ruthless nomadic
Fulani Arabs got to trample on other people's land
unrestricted?
• Buhari raided Awolowo's house at HIGH NOON with
impunity, and all the historical works of the history of the
Yorubas and
other tribes that Awolowo commissioned scholars to write
were taken away till today. On being challenged. Buhari
claimed IBB was responsible for the assault but till today he
did not condemned nor arrested IBB at that time.
I want to ask you Ronke, can a Leopard change its spot?
Would the Jews ever be sympathetic to their persecutors?
They say they will never, and you as a Yoruba lady is being
sentimental to a representative of a race that has been
causing carnage and upheaval throughout West Africa since
1804.
The man from Otuoke, Jonathan and his people have never
slaughtered the Yorubas and other tribes the way Fulani
Arabs have perpetrated and justified incessant killing since
1804.
The only thing you and any reasonable thinking person in
Nigeria and West Africa can do to honor the memory of
countless and needless bloodletting that is always coming
from Arewa north and the Fulani-Arab hegemonists (with
Born-To-Rule mentality) is to deny them the leadership of
anyland and organization in West Africa is remembrance of
countless killings of Yorubas, Beroms,Ogonis, Tivis, Igbos,
Efiks, Anangs, Chambas, Katafs, Gwaris etc.
I am a tribal woman who believes true politics is impossible
under amalgamation. All political parties are automatically
skewed to the advantage of Arewa north because of the
enforced federal character which ensures that sixty percent
of the posts and members are automatically reserved for
the most backward area in Africa, northern Nigeria. In other
words Nigeria's political leadership must never come from
the Arab emirates of Nigeria and West Africa because their
areas are the most backward.
Once upon a time, Buhari's sympathiser: OBJ asked a
former head of state Yakubu Gowon "what have you
forgotten in the state house that you want to go back to
look for" so the same goes as "What has Buhari forgotten in
the state house that he wants to go and look for?"
I await a respond.

When Love Stinks(1)

By Mr.Myrron 2015(All Rights Reserved)

I stood transfixed to the spot as I watched Alero make her
way into the lecture theatre, swaying her hips to the
rhythm of my heart beat. I was momentarily lost as I
watched her walk, I watched her silhouette emerge from
the early morning darkness, I wasn’t expecting her to
come to class that early. The sweat on my palms seemed
to defy the cold harmattan breeze the persistently poured
into the lecture theatre. I swallowed hard as I watched her
make her way gracefully to where I was seating. She wore
the usual smile that exposed her immaculately white
teeth. She walked with the confidence that built up the
tension inside of me. To me, Alero was easily God’s best
piece of creation. She had the right amounts of flesh in
the right places, her fair face seemed to make the sun
look dull when it radiated brightness, but the brightness
didn’t stop in her looks alone. She was among the leading
students in the class.
“Good morning Tom”
The sweet melody in her voice immediately jerked me
back from my reverie.
“Hey”
I muttered looking up, evidently tensed, I was sure she
could hear my heart now pounding with vicious ferocity.
“Good morning”
“How was your night?”
“It was really cold, but nice sha”
She said as she dusted the chair beside me to sit down
“ok”
I said, immediately going blank, I desperately searched
my rebellious head to see if I could get any viable topic
for conversation.
“ehmmm, did you enjoy last Thursday’s chapel service?”
I said immediately regretting the question. It was a
Wednesday morning . Tom! I looked at my crush trying to
figure out if there was any change in her countenance.
She retained her charming smile and top notch
composure, only that she was now sitting, staring deeply
into my eyes. My heart was now racing painfully, and this
girl didn’t look like she was planning to stop anytime
soon. I desperately looked around the cold, dark lecture
theatre desperately searching for anyone that could save
me from the mess I was in. she drew closer. I could now
feel droplets of sweat running through the ridge on my
back.
Right now I didn’t mind even the dean stepping into the
lecture theatre, I desperately prayed for anybody,
somebody to come, but the heavens were quiet, or were
simply delighted watching me go through this torture. She
placed her soft tender hands on my cheek and slowly
brought her lips closer. As her warm breath caressed my
skin that cold harmattan morning, my veins dilated and
some blood rushed to my face. Most of the blood went to
the auxiliary brain between my legs. As she drew closer,
my stomach started rumbling, as if in protest. Just as she
was about the plant the kiss, I let out an awful explosion
of fart. She immediately drew back, unsure of where the
noise was coming from.
Then it hit her.
I felt a push, then another tap, then a slight tap.
“Wake up, the lecturer is here!”
I looked up, and the blurred image before me slowly
became clearer. Then at once, I recognized her. It was
Alero, sitting right next to me. God! Why is this girl
everywhere? I looked up at the empty podium and I
realized that no one was there. Of course! She was
messing with me!
Right there, I wanted to pour out my feelings to her before
I get myself embarrassed again. I wanted to tell her that
right from the first day I saw walked into the lecture
theatre with that lemon green pleat skirt and a flowery top,
she had been all I could think of. As I seriously wracked
my brain to find the right words to express my undying
affection for this epitome of beauty, I started feeling a
familiar sensation in my stomach. Immediately I touched
her. Immediately she turned, My heart started its usual
race. The words disappeared from my head. Then finally, I
managed to speak
“Alero I…….’
Then It happened again. This time, it was not in the safe
privacy my dreams, it was in reality. Immediately, the
whole lecture theatre went quiet, and everybody looked
towards my direction. Immediately, I felt that familiar
sensation I feel anytime I get nervous. Then the
microphone jerked me back to reality….
“Young man, we are waiting for your answer!”
It was the cantankerous MAT121 lecturer. That didn’t help
the situation. I still let it out, loud and clear.

Photo of The Day

1. Survival on the streets of Lagos. Those Danfo buses and their perennial battery problem.Photo credit:Seun Idowu,Nigerian Nostalgia Project.

The Legend of Nigeria vs. India (99-1)

Credits To The Unknown Writer
Virtually everybody born before the invention of
the internet must have heard the tale of a
nonexistent football match between Nigeria and
India that obviously took place in a parallel
universe and somehow we got to hear the gory
stories of that match.
Though there are many variations of the story,
every prevaricator seems to agree on a couple of
facts about this fictional football match. Each
storyteller agrees that;
1. This match ended with India scoring 99 goals
and Nigeria scoring just one goal.
2. Nigerians where unable to kick the ball because
the football kept turning to a lion (or something
scary) to prevent them from playing the soccer
ball.
3. The Indians later agreed that if Nigeria could
score a goal, they would concede defeat
4. Samuel Okwaraji scored the winning goal and
lost his life in the process.
5. FIFA banned India from soccer because they
used black magic in that very game
With the help of common sense (not that it was
absent back then), quick access to information
and the internet, every right thinking Nigerian has
come to realise that such a story should be filled
under “Blatant Lies”.
Why Did This Story Thrive For So Long?
Most people like to pass off this story as true with
the fact that no one has ever seen India in an
International Football Match. Since no one actually
saw India participate in most international soccer
games, this gave a little credence to the story.
India
Another reason this lie could thrive for long was
the fact that credible information was not readily
available at our finger tips. It not like every
Emeka, Audu and Ojo could visit Google in a
matter of minutes and tell our ominous fabricators
that they should stop spreading toxic lies.
And to be honest we have a tingling feeling that
this lie was concocted by an elder of a community
because, let’s be honest who questions the words
of the elders in Nigeria. Remember, what an adult
sees sitting down a child will never see even if he
consults Google, Siri or Cortana.
The Element of Truth In This Story
On the 12th of August 1989, Nigeria lost Sam
Okwaraji.
Sam Okwaraji was the player rumored to have lost
his life in that game when in truth he died during a
FIFA World Cup qualifying game against Angola in
the 77th minute.
He collapsed and died of cognitive heart failure.
May his soul rest in Perfect Peace. AMEN
So that is the only truthful thing about that story,
the fact that a Nigerian player died during a
football match. That’s it. The match was not
against India, we did not lose the match and as
you must have guessed, and there were no lions
either.
What Is The Deal With India Anyway?
India qualified for the 1950 FIFA world cup as a
result of the withdrawal of their scheduled
opponents. But the Indian football governing body,
the All India Football Federation (AIFF) decided
against going to the world cup, being unable to
understand the importance of the event at that
time.
Some of the Reasons shown by the AIFF included
the cost of travel, lack of practice time, team
selection issued and valuing the Olympics over the
FIFA World cup. It should be noted that FIFA
agreed to bear a major part of the travel expenses,
but it did not really help their decision making.
Was India Banned For Refusing To Play Barefoot?
No.
The 1948 London Olympics was India’s first major
international tournament, where a predominantly
barefoot Indian team lost 2 -1 to France.
Following the 1948 Olympics FIFA imposed a rule
banning barefoot play.
The belief that the Indian team refused to play
because they were not allowed to play barefoot is
not entirely true according to the then team
captain who said it was just a story to cover the
disastrous decision of the AFIF.
After the 1950 fiasco, India has never come close
to qualifying for the World Cup.
The reason you do not see India in World Cup
competitions is because they do not qualify
So Does The Indian Team Wear Soccer Boots?
Yes.
In the 1952 Olympics, the Indian team lost 10 – 1
to Yugoslavia (talking about taking a beating). As
a result of this magnanimous defeat the AIFF
made it compulsory for its team members to wear
boots
Is it Possible to win a match with a 99 – 1 match
margin?
Yes.
It is absolutely possible to rake 99 – 1 from a
single football match. Let’s take a walk down
memory lane and see how this is even possible.
Now allow us to digress.
The highest scoring soccer game was 149-0!
You’re probably wondering how a soccer team
could be so bad that they let 149 goals be scored,
but the truth is it was a form of protest. The event
occurred in 2002 after a 2-2 draw between rival
teams Stade Olympique de L’emyrne, or SOE, and
AS Adema of Madagascar, which resulted in the
referees awarding a penalty causing SOE to lose
the game.
During a match fixing debacle in Nigeria, the
Feeders scored 72 of their 79-0 victory in 45
minutes of play. Police Machine scored 61 of their
67-0 victory in the second half. At one point, they
scored four goals in a minute.
Arbroath won Bon Accord 36 – 0 in 1885. It held
the largest margin of victory in professional
football where both sides wanted to win.
So, yes, given the “right circumstances”, a team
could actually receive 99 – 1 beating without any
black magic whatsoever.

The Man In The Church

As Told By Royver

I don’t know how to tell this story, so I’m just going to tell
it and leave it for you to figure out because I’m tired of
thinking about it and I want it out of my system. My name
isn’t necessary, it’s just enough to let you know I used to
sweep the Catholic Church down the road every Tuesday
and Thursday for the past two years. I do it as a kind of
penance for my sins; I don’t know…it kind of gives me
grace. I feel peace doing it. I’m a four hundred level
medical student so you don’t think I’m some bum with
nothing better to do than sweep churches. I don’t belong
to any church group and I’ll be the first to tell you that
sweeping gives me asthma attacks. So why do I do it?
Like I said, it makes me feel peaceful. Gives me grace.
Anyway, enough of me and on to the real issue here.
Going to church every Sunday is okay for most folks. The
bible did say to keep the Sabbath day holy and all that.
There’s nothing wrong in going to church only on
Sundays. I do it myself. The Tuesday and Thursday thing
is usually done after the mass. But it is on these days
that I meet the strangest of people.
There’s the girl that comes every Tuesday and kneels
before the Blessed Sacrament, crying her eyes out and
holding a picture of her family. I know because I have
spied that picture more than once when sweeping close to
her. Guess she’s got family issues. There’s the guy who
comes to the church soon after mass and sits beside the
statue of Mary only to open his engineering textbooks and
project works. He’s been driven out countless times by
the parish priest but he always finds a way to sneak back
in when he thinks no one is looking. I guess he needs
supernatural help in his studies. I don’t know if it works
for him though.
There’s the old woman who comes for mass without fail
and then kneels in front of the altar until she goes to
sleep. Literally snores. After about thirty minutes she
wakes up, makes the sign of the cross and goes home.
Dunno what that is about. I guess it’s between her and
God.
There are pious people and pious looking people. There’s
the girl who comes and prays real hard after church only
to go outside and put on flashy makeup and head for
class, always on skimpy and very sexy attires. There’s the
guy who says extra prayers while I sweep past him and
then when he thinks no one is looking he drops some
spare change into the box for the poor.
So many characters. But this story is not about any of
them.
There was this guy I noticed right around three months
ago. He came to church when the mass was over, when
the church was completely empty and then he entered the
church. I knew he was doing something there but I could
never really catch him at it. The moment I came in he
would either go out and wait until I finished sweeping and
left for lectures or if it looked like I was going to stay
longer, he would give up and go home. If any of the other
characters I mentioned was in the church, he would stay
outside until they left. He was very persistent and never
ever missed a Tuesday or Thursday. I couldn’t tell whether
he came on other days or not and I didn’t have anybody to
ask. I noticed he would come in looking a little gloomy and
down in the dumps and then leave feeling recharged,
relieved, happy. But I was quite sure the happiness wasn’t
from prayer. He looked…there isn’t any other way of
saying this…high. Like he was high on some drug.
Whenever he came out his eyes would be wide open, his
nostrils flaring, his breathing faster and he would grin at
all and sundry and then move on his merry way. I began
to suspect there was more to it than met the eye with this
customer.
One day curiosity got the better of me and I decided to find
out what Mr. Super happy was up to. I came to church as
usual when the service was about rounding up, waited for
them to finish, then began to sweep out the church. I
made sure to wake the old woman sleeping at the altar
and she thanked me and went home. I inspected the
statue of Mary and luckily the engineering student as
nowhere to be found today. I swept out the church and
went outside and sure enough he was there, the mystery
man, waiting patiently for me to leave. I nodded in
greeting at him and he reciprocated with a small smile. I
then proceeded to start sweeping outside the church. My
plan was to keep sweeping around until he felt I wasn’t
noticing and then I would sneak into the church and
observe him.
As soon as I moved some distance off to the back of the
church, sweeping like my life depended on it and raising
not a little dust, my suspect went inside. I waited a little
bit, timing it just right because I knew from experience
that he spent an average of fifteen to twenty uninterrupted
minutes in the church before he was done. I gave him ten
minutes during which time I had inhaled enough dust to
make a vacuum cleaner jealous. I started wheezing a little
bit but I kept up the good work, making sure he thought I
was very busy. And then I dropped the broom and tiptoed
back to the entrance. If I walked right in he would see me
instantly so I went on my knees (hey, I was really
curious!) and crawled on my belly into the church, using
the side pews to hide me from being seen.
I was still on my belly and crawling towards the altar when
I heard the sweetest sound. It was like a choirperson was
singing somewhere, probably from a music device the
man was carrying but the voice were so clear and
beautiful that I had to assume the device was really high
tech. The sound was sending sweet shockwaves through
my body and I made up my mind there and then to ask
him to transfer it to my phone after I was done spying on
him. As I got closer, the voice became louder and then I
had the eerie feeling that it was not coming from a music
device, it was being sung live. I raised myself to my knees
and peeked over the pew.
Think what you like, but I’m telling you right now that guy
was standing on air. I mean he was literally standing on
nothing a few feet above the ground, his two hands
clutched to his chest and his mouth open wide. He was
the one doing the singing and from the altar a light was
shining towards him. I blinked once or twice in case it was
a reflection from the sun outside or something, but no.
That light was coming from the altar! I didn’t know when I
let out a small cry of alarm. The guy turned around
startled and I saw his mouth and eyes were filled with
light.
I got to my feet and ran faster than I had ever run in my
life. I ran through the door like a bullet, not screaming, not
having enough breath to scream, not realizing I was
having a full blown asthmatic attack. Not until I collapsed
near the fence of the church from sheer exhaustion and
lack of oxygen. The air just couldn’t get through to my
lungs, my chest was so tight. I raised my head and looked
around to see if anyone could help me…and saw the guy
standing in front of me. I couldn’t even scream though I
was scared silly.
He smiled and knelt beside me and put his hand on my
chest. Immediately my lungs opened and cool wonderful
air flowed in. I breathed in once, twice and soon I was
alright again. I sat up and gazed at the man in front of me.
He didn’t look so frightening anymore and the light had
gone from his mouth and eyes.
“You nearly scared yourself to death there.” He said.
“Don’t you know better than to sneak up on people?”
“I’m sorry sir.” I said immediately. He laughed.
“It’s okay. I’m just glad you are alright.”
“Are you, like, an angel?” I asked.
He smiled again.
“You have a good heart. Keep up the good work. The Lord
really appreciates it when you do things for him from the
depth of your heart and not because you are being forced
to do it.”
“Okay.” I said. I didn’t know what else to say.
“I have to go now. Tell Eunice to call home tomorrow and
tell Matthew that if he wants to pass he has to return
those books to their owners.”
“Okay.” I repeated.
Then he strolled to the church gate, his hands in his
pockets and entered a bus and was gone.
I didn’t even ask his name or number.
The next day I went to church. I waited until the girl with
the family picture came into the Blessed Sacrament and I
went to her.
“Excuse me please, are you Eunice?” I asked.
She looked at me curiously.
“Yes, do I know you?”
She had a nice smile when she wasn’t crying so much.
“Em, I was told to tell you to call your home today.”
Her eyes widened. “By who?”
“One guy like this. Sha call home.” I said and moved
towards the statue of Mary where the engineering student
had settled in for his early morning study.
“Matthew?”
The guy nearly jumped out of his skin. “What?”
“I was told to tell you that if you want to pass you have to
return those books to their owners.”
Matthew looked at me for a few seconds. The next thing I
knew he was on his feet and had me by the collar of my
shirt.
“Who are you?” He shouted. “Are you calling me a thief?”
I was about to respond when we both heard a loud cry and
we turned around to see Eunice on the phone crying and
kneeling and shouting
“Praise God for healing!” Then she cut the call and ran
towards me. Matthew released me as she fell into my
arms and hugged me tight.
“God bless you! My father and mother are going to be
alright!” She smiled through happy tears. “Who are you?”
“Me?” I gasped. “No, I’m not the one…there was this guy
yesterday…”
“You must show him to me tomorrow!” She shouted and
the parish priest appeared from the hallway. Matthew was
looking at me strangely. Suddenly he picked up his books
and things and hurried out of the church. The parish priest
sent me and Eunice out as well and shut the door.
The strange man never came back. I came the next day
with Eunice to see him, no show. I came the day after that
and the day after that day but till now he has not returned.
Eunice and I are currently in a relationship. Don’t laugh,
I’m trying to keep it as godly as possible but my goodness
she is wonderful wife material. She's so kind and caring.
She makes me so happy and we study wonderfully well
together. She’s an accounting student by the way. I have
a feeling that she’s going to be a big blessing to my life
and we are going to share a future together.
I guess I just want to say, Thanks bros.
Thanks, God.